What Are You Doing To Care For Yourself?
This week I took a Coaching by the River walk with longtime friend and colleague Robert Dortch – once a client, then partner, and now colleague – I will never pass up an opportunity to connect with him. Robert and I took an hour to unpack some of the things I have been feeling and navigating lately and towards the end we landed upon my work for the moment. He asked, what are you doing to care for yourself? So this month, there is no big blog post or article about change – this month I want to borrow that question and turn it back around to you as you read.
Self-Care Isn't Selfish, It's Strategic
I know what you're thinking – you've heard this before. But here's the thing: leaders who don't care for themselves can't effectively care for their teams or organizations. When we're running on empty, we make reactive decisions instead of strategic ones. We lose perspective. We burn out just when our organizations need us most.
That walk with Robert wasn't an indulgence – it was necessary. It gave me space to think clearly, to process what I've been navigating, and to reconnect with why this work matters.
Small Acts Matter More Than Grand Gestures
You don't need a week-long retreat or a complete lifestyle overhaul. Sometimes caring for yourself is as simple as a walk by the river with someone who knows you well. Maybe it's blocking 30 minutes on your calendar that's actually just for thinking. Maybe it's saying no to one more commitment so you can say yes to rest.
What does care look like for you? For some leaders it's movement – running, yoga, a walk around the block. For others it's quiet – reading, journaling, just sitting. For some it's connection – coffee with a colleague, a call with a mentor, time with family. There's no right answer, but there is an answer if we give it space.
What Gets in the Way?
I'll tell you what gets in the way for most leaders I know: guilt. The feeling that if you're taking time for yourself, you're somehow failing your team or your mission or your business. The belief that everything will fall apart if you step away for even an hour. The sense that self-care is something you'll get to "when things calm down" – spoiler alert, things never calm down – least of all these days.
But here's what I've learned: the organizations that thrive are led by people who have enough in their own tanks to keep going. You can't pour from an empty cup, as the saying goes. And right now, in this season of uncertainty and change we've been writing about all year, we need leaders who are resourced enough to think strategically, not just survive.
Make It a Practice
Robert's question – "what are you doing to care for yourself?" – shouldn't be a one-time reflection. It should be something we ask ourselves regularly. Weekly, even. Because the answer will change depending on what we're navigating and what we need.
So here's my challenge to you as we head into autumn: Ask yourself this question once a week. And then actually do one thing based on your answer. Not someday, do it each week. Bonus - Robert still has some spots open for coaching walks.
What are you doing to care for yourself?